The Importance of Empathy

‍The Importance of Empathy

Lately, the word empathy has been popping up everywhere—on social media, in the news, and in conversations about how we relate to one another. The pendulum often swings between two extremes: on one side, we hear that empathy is essential, that we should extend it even toward those whose values or beliefs don’t align with our own. On the other side, we hear that it’s perfectly fine to withhold empathy altogether. The truth, as it often does, lies somewhere in between.

At its core, empathy is not about agreeing with someone. As Brené Brown describes, empathy is the ability to step inside another person’s experience and understand, sometimes deeply, the emotions or feelings that live there. It’s the simple but profound act of saying, “I see you. I feel you.” That doesn’t mean we adopt their viewpoint or excuse their behavior. It simply means we recognize their humanity.

Empathy is a bridge. It humanizes the person across from us, and in turn, it allows them to feel seen and understood. This act of connection creates the groundwork for trust, communication, and, often, healing. In fact, empathy is most powerful when we disagree with someone. By choosing to try to understand their emotional world, we’re making space for dialogue rather than division.

In the therapy room, empathy is not just helpful—it’s essential. It is the primary strategy we use to understand the meaning behind someone’s lived experiences. Empathy helps us make sense of what’s happening in a person’s life and gives us clues about how they can begin to understand themselves differently. Through empathy, clients often discover new ways of making meaning and identifying the changes they want to pursue. Without empathy, therapy would be little more than problem-solving. With empathy, it becomes a deeply human process of growth, understanding, and transformation.

This doesn’t mean empathy should be limitless or boundaryless—we can practice empathy while still holding firm to our values and protecting others and ourselves from harm. But when we lean into empathy, especially in moments of conflict or difference, we create opportunities to connect across divides that otherwise feel insurmountable.

So maybe the invitation isn’t to offer empathy without discernment, nor to withhold it altogether. Instead, it’s to recognize empathy as one of the most humanizing tools we have—one that allows us to honor our shared humanity, even when our perspectives don’t align.

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